The Art of Saying "YES" Too Fast

Assalam

Untung lah if you got to read this entry. Am sharing a (vulnerable) bit of mine. A habit yang selalu end up bikin jiwa kacau.

Alkisahnya, I have this reflex where, the moment someone shares an idea that sounds fascinating or meaningful, I immediately say yes. No internal meeting. No proper evaluation. My heart just jumps in first. If it feels exciting, impactful, aligned with purpose — I’m sold. Agreement given. Commitment emotionally stamped. Brain? Hmm..still buffering. Sebab hati duluan menjawab "YA" tanpa consult akal fikir. Haru!!

Then a few days later, when the idea starts turning into actual action — timelines, responsibilities, maybe even my name officially attached to it — suddenly I freeze. “Eh, Kijap!! Apa benda juga ni? Do I actually know how to do this?” Time ni mulalah gelabah take over, parking chantekk ja dalam kepala. Mulalah replay the conversations I had in my head, trying to remember if I really agreed or if it was just enthusiastic nodding. Mulalah ketuk balik kotak ingatan, ketuk dada tanya diri sendiri like, “Did I sign up for this? Since when am I part of this big thing or idea?” 😆 

Funny baa!! Tapi revealing at the same time juga la. I realise I tend to agree based on what I feel in the moment. If it feels meaningful, I’m in. If it sounds impactful, I’m sold. And sometimes excitement volunteers me into rooms where I’m not fully equipped yet. Sabahan bilang, "Yang penting semangat!!" Rasa macam 'bahaya' baa bila my feelings move faster than my capacity. Takut2 nanti result tidak menepati piawai 🤭 Tapi itu laa..it's the same reason juga I always end up in meaningful spaces where others are too scared to enter. 

SOOOOO...MAYBE..just maybe..this habit is not always a bad thing juga laa baa I guess. Sometimes we grow into the roles we impulsively say yes to. Still, I’m learning. Learning to pause. To let my mind catch up with my feelings. To ask one extra question before saying yes. Or even nod. hahahah!! Growth, apparently in most of my case, begins with slight panic and a lot of self-interrogation. 

But until then — if tiba-tiba I went around asking, “Eh… did I actually agree to this ah?” Faham2 jaa la ya, it’s growth in progress 😌

till next n3,

wassalam...